


A Lonely Place

by Firebull



Series: Tumblr Ficlets [3]
Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! GX
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon Compliant, Nonbinary Yubel, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-12
Updated: 2018-12-12
Packaged: 2019-09-17 00:10:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 687
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16964091
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Firebull/pseuds/Firebull
Summary: For as long as Judai could remember his mind was an unusually lonely place. Not that he knew much about minds and how they should feel like, but to him it was as if something was missing. Something that should’ve been there with him in the warm embrace of darkness.





	A Lonely Place

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted [here](https://gx5ds.tumblr.com/post/178646324501/day-1-a-lonely-place) for ygotober 2018
> 
> repost because tumblr

For as long as Judai could remember his mind was an unusually lonely place. Not that he knew much about minds and how they should feel like, but to him it was as if something was missing. Something that should've been there with him in the warm embrace of darkness.

He asked his parents about it once. Parents were supposed to know this stuff, right? His parents froze for a moment before his father turned to him. “It's probably just the constant moving getting to you. Why don't you try to make some friends tomorrow? We'll be here for at least a year,” he had said.

Judai knew that that wasn't the problem. He wanted to ask further, but his mother still refused to look at him and his father had a weird look in his eyes. So he agreed to go out the next day and try to make some friends. 

It never helped. No matter how many friends he made in the months before the next move none of them could fill the loneliness in his mind. Maybe they couldn't because he knew they'd only be around for such a short time. Maybe he just needed a place to stay for a while.

And then came Duel Academy and with it the best friends he ever made. Sure, each of them were messed up in their own way, but then so was he and for the first time his mind didn't feel as lonely. When he got his Neo-Spacians and he learned that he controlled the Gentle Darkness the warmth of the darkness in his mind made sense. 

But he couldn't shake the feeling that something was still missing. Something nagged at him since he remembered sending the Neo-Spacians to space. It felt as if he wasn't remembering the whole thing.

Then Yubel stood in front of him and the memories rushed through him. Of receiving Yubel as a gift, of talking to Yubel and learning how to duel from them. Of Yubel hurting people and him sending them off to space to be fixed just for them both to burn in the fires of the Light of Ruin. Of the silence and loneliness that followed.

They were barely together before they were ripped apart once more.

He knew it should've been him staying back with Yubel, Johan was already too deep as it was and now he was who knows where with Yubel, suffering for Judai's sins. They all did. None of this would've happened if he never send them away.

Of course he went to the other dimension in hopes of finding both of them. Of course the others wanted to come and help him. Of course it didn't work out nearly as well as they hoped it would. Of course he messed it all up.

He had way too much time to think while Haou took over the fighting for him. It was weird being him yet not being him. The darkness held him closer than ever as if protecting him from outside threats, trying to soothe him as he grieved his friends.

Jim's light pushed Haou back and allowed Judai to take control of his body again. He could still feel Haou in his mind, holding Judai in his arms, telling him that Super Fusion was ready to help them get Yubel back.

At the time he didn't understand how that would work, but now standing before Yubel being Judai/Haou/himself he understood. There was really only one way to free Yubel from the influence from the Light of Ruin. It took a while to get everything in position to use Spiritual Fusion with more close calls than he would've liked, but he got it off, choosing himself and Yubel as Fusion materials. 

The world faded away and then it was just them. Yubel took their rightful place in his mind, his very soul, as his body adjusted to no longer being human. They'd never be separated again. They'd never have this loneliness eating away at them ever again and for the first time in forever they felt truly complete.


End file.
